Carpe nappum

Seize the Day? More like nap it away.....

Some one woke up way too early on Christmas morning and had one too many slices of butterbraids at the inlaws....a big thanks to my brother-in-law for forwarding...not sure Jason's gonna be too happy with Glenn....but oh well.

Teenagers with attitude should NOT be working at Wallmart

OMG.....
So I go to Wallmart tonight to get some sterno for our new Smores making machine and some olive oil, I'm making a tortilla (Spanish Omelet, not a Mexican flour tortilla). While I was there I picked up all sorts of, "oh I need those items, I didn't know I needed", a cast iron crepe pan, a folding cutting board (how cool is that, you cut your stuff, then fold it and pour the cut up stuff in the pan, or whatever), a DVD for walking with these arm bands....this was because I went to open my new Yoga DVD only to realize Overstock sent me Grandes heroes Y Leyendas de la Biblia, instead....and I do feel sorry for the Spanish speaking family who got a Yoga DVD instead of their bible lesson but I'm feeling more sorry for myself, thus the impulse buy at Wallmart. I was even able to pass on some sale info on some really nice TV's on to Martha (trying to pay it forward for the awesome Wii deal she found me a couple months ago)....So all in all I was feeling pretty good when I got to the check stand...oh, and I was second in line....I mean, really, how often does that happen at a Wallmart....The teenage boy (Joel) starts ringing me up (um...no hello by the way), I swipe my card and I paused for a minute before pushing the 'no cash' button and it asks for my card again...I say, "oh, look at that it needs my card again", I swipe it, he says "Yeah, it's time sensitive" As I'm swiping my card again. A message flashes that I'm supposed to tell the cashier that he needs to push debit, so I tell him. (And by his attitude, I'm thinking I really wasn't supposed to tell him....but how am I supposed to know that? The machine flashed, I complied). He says, "I do that at the end of the order" so I ask, "Oh, ok, will I need to swipe my card again?"

Him: Sigh...do you want me to ring you out right now?
Me: Ah...no, I just want to know If I can put my card away.
Him: It's time sensitive (referring to the machine)
Me: So, I may have to swipe it again?
Him: Do you want me to just total you up right now? (most of my purchases still on the conveyor belt)
Me: No?
Him: Ok, then.

apparently my question was answered? Did you see the answer above? Oh and his tone of voice was one you use with really stupid people with whom you are frustrated (I know because I've used that tone before) I kept my credit card out (got to hear him sigh when it took me the whole 10 seconds it takes to put it back in the wallet and the wallet back in my purse)....

This isn't the most egregious part....
He gets to my impulse buy....the DVD with the hand thingies that are supposed to increase the workout somehow. He opens the box and looks through it, takes the video out and really looks deeply into the box and then reads the box to see what's included.....it then dawned on me HE THOUGHT I WAS STEALING SOMETHING.....

I so wish I was the kind of person who could say something in a case like this. My mouth did gape a bit (just looking at me, open mouthed, probably justified his talking way down to me). I paid for my items and walked out....seething, because I really really wish I could have asked, why me....Was it the dark hair, olive skin that just shouted thief? The Crepe pan? The frozen chicken breasts? What the hell?

It's too bad I'm a wuss....but you know, I REFUSED to return my cart to the cart station in the parking lot....that'll show them!

Guys are so weird....

I'll get to why my title is what it is in a few seconds...but first, my ornament exchange party was a blast. Should you like to see pictures (and I wish mine was never taken) you can see them on Aimee's blog and most likely in a couple of days or so (she has had a sick one at home and isn't as Martha as she normally is) you can catch some more pictures on Martha's blog I didn't have my camera on hand and didn't take any pictures....thank goodness I have friends who take lots of pictures and who blog so I can safely be LAZY.

This morning, Jake wakes up and declares that he is 'done dressing cool' he explains that it's just so much work planning his outfits each day. He goes on to explain that I couldn't possibly understand the stress he's been under to make sure he looks so cool. It's just been too much for him so he's just gonna put on any ol' thing he has in his drawer without much thought at all because it's just so much easier that way.

Bwahahahahah, that kid cracks me up!

One of Jason's co-workers came back from China recently and told Jason this really funny story (thus my title)....
Apparently in the Shanghai Hooters (I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt and hope they were at a Hooters for some American food???) the men's bathroom attendant massages the guy's back as he is using the urinal (I wonder if that's in the travel brochures?). Well this buddy of Jason's offered the guy double his tip to STOP (Jason, bless his soul, would have most likely stopped peeing and then would not have been able to pee again for a few days). Then his direct report came in and so he offered the attendant an extra 10$ to go up to the direct report and start on him. Direct report called Jason's buddy some name when he came back to the table.....

And yes this was funny--in that weird practical joke way that always gives me the giggles....but what I really find amusing is that women don't do things like this to each other. I swear guys play the most gay jokes on each other. Guys are just weird!

AHHHHHHHH

I have so much to do....so I'm blogging instead. First, I'm so over Hotmail right now...I can't seem to get the 150 junk mails deleted so I can sort through the real mail (mail I haven't gotten to in a few days) It takes me three tries to send out an email and sometimes people get three emails or sometimes they get none. But the pain it would be to transfer everything over to another provider fills me with dread!

Oh, done whining....so, I'm giving a party on Wednesday, it's an ornament exchange party and it's lots of fun....I'm trying to make it easier on myself and I bought premade appetizers from Sam's Club. I'm almost done with my baking but now I have to clean clean clean, but I don't even want to attempt it because it feels like once a room is done the kids gravitate to that very room and mess it all up again....it makes me want to crawl out of my skin!!!!! Under my breath, I remind myself it's their house too, blah blah blah, BUT GIVE ME A BREAK....PLEASE.
Oh, I guess I'm not done whining...

I bet, if I lived in this one house on the north side of B street my life would be perfect. This house has the third car garage, it's the end of a cul-de-sac in the MIDDLE of the subdivision, four bedrooms and a main floor study (with a bay window) and a porch the length of the house. How more perfect can you get then that? I drove Jason by last night and said, "if that house goes on sale honey, we're buying it" He said okay, but only because he doesn't think it's going to happen.....I know, I know moving to a house in the same neighborhood may sound funny, but it's a great neighborhood (and it's been done before, wink wink nudge nudge, MARTHA). Jason and I were joking that we should put speakers around the house that whispers ghost noises 'get out now'; 'sell to the Zimmers'; 'sell for $200.00' ....I don't know why that' s funny but we were giggling...

ok, ok, we don't live in a great house, just one with potential (although we don't have that third car garage and wouldn't be able to add that on). But it still needs to be cleaned...after I make the lemon bars and raspberry linzer bars...ok ok, I'll go now and work!

oh and if it passes the neighborhood taste test, I'll post the recipe for Velveeta peanut butter fudge....

Something Accomplished, Not on my list....

Grabbed that last garbage bag from a last minute sweep of the upstairs and ran down the driveway, in the snow, in my flip flops to be able to catch the sanitation engineers (or whatever) before they left and fell and then fell again trying to get up. Yeah, guys hope you liked the laugh...that could be your Christmas tip...

OK, I'm not really a scrooge, I'll give them their tip.

I've been trying new recipes for my neighbor's cookie exchange party and so far everything's been dismal. Chocolate cookies, blah, sesame cookies looked promising but I think I put too much flour in them and they turned out too cake-like. A couple years ago I made these cookies and although not Christmasy, way yummy, I'll share the recipe...

Amaretto Chunk Cookies
From Oct 2005 Good Housekeeping and tweaked by Tracey Zimmer

Adjusted for high altitude…. reduce flour by ¼ cup and oven temp. to 375° should you leave Colorado for some unfathomable reason.

· 5¼ cup of flour
· 2 tsp of baking soda
· 2 tsp baking powder
· 1 tsp salt
· 4 sticks of butter, softened
· 2 C of brown sugar
· 1 C of sugar
· 4 eggs
· 2 Tbsp of Amaretto liqueur (and heck a glass of that stuff for the cook)
· 4 tsp of almond extract
· 2 C of semi-sweet chocolate chips
· 2 C of milk-chocolate chocolate chips
· 2 C of sweetened flaked coconut
· 2 C of sliced almonds

Preheat oven to 380°.

Beat butter and sugars until creamy. Beat in eggs, amaretto and extract. Throw in the soda, powder and salt and mix. Add the flour slowly (you know because if you do it too fast you get flour all over the place) until it’s all well blended. Add chocolate, coconut and almonds….and take a spoonful and try it….raw cookie dough - what could be better?

Drop dough on cookie sheet, to get the actual amount of cookies that the recipe says this will make you have to do teeny-weeny spoonfuls….yeah right, so what if you have less cookies you’ll get bigger ones so take a heapin’ spoonful and plop those puppies down on an ungreased sheet. Bake for about 10 minutes…more like 12 if you do the heapin’ amount. Cool on pan for a couple minutes ----only because you’ll burn your tongue if you eat them too quickly…then if any left, put on a rack to completely cool.

Enjoy
Makes about 8 dozen cookies…hahahaha, who are they kidding? Maybe 5 dozen if you’re really chintzy


Right now I'm trying a Paula Dean Peanut Butter Fudge recipe that calls for Velveta...hmmm, I just had to try it --for that reason only, I mean if it's good, can you imagine the looks on people's faces when you tell them there's Velveta in there? And in Paula Dean fashion, there's a stick a buttah (or two) in the recipe too.

fa la la la

I'm feeling a bit better, still have a low grade fever and it hurts to swallow, this is one stinker of a bug...So for now I'll catch up on pictures....The day after thanksgiving we go to a tree farm and cut down our own tree....it's sort of in between heading to the mountains and buying it prewrapped. Next year we decided to brave the real forest but for now, this is good.

My intrepid tree hunters (and how did the youngest end up with the saw? that's an accident waiting to happen)
It was really really cold, 19 degrees F (see below picture for proof) so this was the first year we didn't march all over the place looking for the perfect tree. We just drove around a bit, and from the car, saw this one and thought, good enough!
This morning the boys decorated their gingerbread houses. They talked about how much fun it'll be to eat them after Christmas, but I started this tradition where Santa takes the very best ones on Christmas Eve to be houses for the elves. The boys were very excited about that, once they were reminded, but Jason was kind of upset about it. I whisper to him, "Hey, Christmas Eve at midnight when we're cleaning up from our Christmas Eve bash and putting presents under the tree you can go to town on them....honey".
No, that's not a hearing aid in Jason's ear, it's his phone that is permanently lodged there.

I've been sick...and it really really sucks. Yesterday I had a fever of a 103 and barely made it out of bed, today the fever's down but everything I do takes such effort. At least I took a shower and brushed my teeth, then took a nap. I ventured downstairs for breakfast at 11, had ginger ale and toast and a sucked on a throat thingy...then took a nap,

Anyhow,
I'll catch up on funner stuff later, but I just wanted people to feel sorry for me! I'm feeling very pitiful!

I'm gonna check my email and take another nap, maybe make it to the store for some soup.