Saturday, June 09, 2007

Second Guessing

Tonight is anti-date night...all the kiddos are over here. They're happily playing in the back yard without incident (knock on wood I may have just jinxed myself) and I find myself thinking that maybe I could have had a large family.....Naaa.

I had this long post ready to glad I didn't hit 'publish post' because it was pretty much just here's the gist.

I have great friends who know I am a flawed human being and still like me. I'm a lucky woman. Even knowing this, I "hear" the voice of a toxic, narcissistic, sociopathic ex-friend somehow making me out to be a bad guy. I really need to learn to believe when the people around me say they are fine with what happened (it sounds like something's not, I just bailed on a babysitting promise).

I was horrible at this whole knowing how to 'play' the smile and mean something else game in high school and I haven't gotten any better at it now!

Thank you Martha for being a blunt person, I like knowing where I stand with you, and I so admire how dedicated you are to your family.
Thank you Colleen for being so nice and laid back and really not caring when plans go with the flow, that's great.
Thank you Katrina for being understanding and gracious when things don't go as planned.
Aimee, you have a great sense of humor, and thank you so much for that Strong stand by your friend personality that you have.
Shaina and Gina, I'm so lucky to have both of you as sister-in-laws not many people can boast of even one person they would chose to be in their family and I can say I have two I would most definitely have chosen!

I love my friends, they love me...sociopathic narcissistic toxic b*&^c can BITE ME.

now that's good therapy.


Colleen O said...

I'm trying to think of a really nasty acronym. . . but it's late, and I'm tired. Ah yes, let the healthy not stagnant chi flow! In with the good friends, out with the bad. I feel better justs knowing you feel better.

Martha said...

Between your post and Colleen's, I'm thinking I missed out on something good. Bummer man, you know how I love to gossip!
But I also don't want to stir up next anxiety!
Would anyone care for some pie?

And thanks for the praise...i do worry that my blunt nature and the way in which I get all worked up over little stuff makes me a candidate for the Toxic Trophy, but I guess not, eh?

tz said...

oh martha most def. not -- I would say refreshing!

Aimee said...

First Martha makes me cry with the whole mosiac thing and then you make me sniff, sniff with your bolg. I guess I'm REALLY horomonial this week. Hopefully things will get back on track soon.